What I Want Engraved On My Tombstone
by Josh Amidon
“Joshua J. Amidon
1985 – XXXX
His final wish is for everyone to not advertise in the Yellow Pages”
A client recently asked me “Should I advertise in the phone book?” My response was so loud and fervent; I almost scared him out of his chair. Sidenote: I felt bad, but he needed to know asking such questions was unacceptable. I get this question more often than you might imagine.
So in an effort to prevent any more business owners from using their hard-earned dollars on dead-end advertising, here are some different questions I get about the Yellow Pages and my answers.
Why is it so expensive?
Gather round kids, let me tell you a story. Once upon a time, the Yellow Pages was the evil empire of the advertising world. They managed to set up a paradigm amongst small businesses everywhere that success in life and in businesses ran through that little yellow book of theirs. They also established pricing structures that made it very difficult for business owners to down-size their ads when they realized the costs were too high. Luckily for all though, this little thing called ‘The Internet’ was invented and businesses far and wide celebrated cost effective advertising and marketing solutions that actually worked; and smart small business owners lived happily ever after….the end
Should I pay for Yellow Pages?
In a nutshell? No, unless you’re the type that loves throwing $20 bills off country bridges.
Small Businesses needs to be in the Yellow Pages, right?
Yes, and I need to saw my ankle off with a grapefruit spoon….maybe I’m being dramatic, but the idea that you have to be in the Yellow Pages to be successful is about that same amount of absurd.
Why do big companies still advertise in Yellow Pages?
Short Answer: Because big companies spend big money on dumb things.
Long Answer: Big companies put money in EVERYTHING. Don’t ever do something just a big national company does something. Think about your total marketing budget for the year? Got the answer? That’s how much they spent taking their assistant out to lunch yesterday.
Hearing these type of questions gives me an anxiety attack, but if you have any questions or concerns – please don’t hesitate to contact me firstname.lastname@example.org or 315-258-8780